I was smoking at the balcony and I thought about letters. I’ve bought an ink for my ink pen two days ago. My hadwriting is no so beautiful as some people have, but using the ink pen it get some special charm and attractiveness. So I decided to write a REAL handwritten letter on a paper and send it to some address. Not more than 5% that I will get an answer and about 30% that it won’t be delievered. But I have to write it. I had this desire long time ago. My thoughts were interrupted by pigeon who settled at my cornice and stared at me. “Oh, how great it would be to tie a letter to his leg like in ancient times.. But it flew away, somewhere higher.


Today I had a question regarding my first post in this book. Regarding the time and the person who went offline. Well… I must admit – I feiled to make complete depersonalization. I could not suppose that she (who asked that question) will ever visit this blog. Something is unclear. But in fact I do not care ). The more people will know – the more readers I get. The more readers I get – the more clicks, hahahaha. I do not care about deep understanding, I care only about clicks. Ah, yeah, and also about my personal content page. So that when I will need to ressurect something in the memory – I can easily access the writing. Whenever I would be. I have plently to write about. Later-later. Only the oath has pushed me to this page tonight.


It was a rainy morning when I wend to sell freedom. The rain always reminds me about perspectives. And this interview tended to be perspective and promising. The head of department was a woman and it was a plus for me! We’ve talked for more than one hour. And she was talking more. It also good sign, cause if I would be of no interest for their company – why do I need to know all these details? She missed several calls. Probably on auto-pilot I’ve made some erotic manipulating movements. These small techniques I often use automaticly when I communicate with women. Even in public transport sometimes when I see pretty girl – I start to “manipulate”.

The case of freedom. That was the name of the book I’ve started several years ago and this one – is the reincarnation of that unwritten book. Yes, now I’m looking for the way to sell my freedom, but only partially. After the interview the rain was over. But the fresh breath remained in the air. The smell of freedom. I had a good mood and I’ll know the results in a week.


My ideas about possible bug brought me to conclusion that the fact the number was in URL made this bug happen. I’ll check now. Hopefully this is the point.

The Google domination

What do you think when the Google domination would stop? I don’t mean it should be considered as some goal. No, not at all. But the internet is changing rapidly and dramaticly. New ideas, new projects and new companies could change Google’s monopoly. But when? Now Google’s profits grow and so do their products and services. I.e. I really like Google Buzz, I must acknowledge I like it even more than twitter. Yes, I have more than 6 000 followers in Twitter, but almost nobody from this long list ever visits my blog! And in Google Buzz – when I share some link I assume that 10-15 people click (and I have no more than 30 followers)


The same thing. Final try and I go to sleep whatever result it would be


Some bug with my previous writing. Finally I’ve came up with the decision of continuous novel-writing process and some forces distract me. I have no time and desire to find the reason why this bug occured. That’s why I have to write this second short and not-so-literal post – to check wheather it will go withour bug. May not it be cut with a knife…

– 1035

I had to choose something as a way for making titles to this novel.

At 10.35 PM my last message was sent to her. Some time later she went offline. Not available was written in that messenger. And I wrote a poem with the name NA. And I had to choose some numeration for my novel. When I smoked and stared at the beautifyl moon I thought that I need to come to the zero. I need to come to the zero point. So I will start from “-1035” and then hopefully I will reach this zero point. It could have been 22:35 and it would make my journty to the zero twice harder.

Is it harder to live when she is online? Will I tend to resist the will to start the conversation? Do I need to resist it? It’s easier to write “Hi” and wait for the possible responce. And I did it.

But no responce till now and the fact that she never, NEVER starts talking. Me is the one who always has to take initiative and all these initiatives lead to the worst.

The desires must not transfer into goals. 12:43 and she is offline once again. And there was one idea to discuss, the idea which I do not wish to discuss with anybody else. The ideas are circulating always inside of my brain, insided of my mind. Even when I’m asleep, they keep to form my second part of self – subconscious. I could be terrified when I realize how many ideas have died without being realized. I have to note them? Then I have to become full-time write of ideas. But who will start to implement them? I would have no time. So nobody. Well, I need to sort ideas.

Eh maintenant, Sorte! (fr.)


New Ambition
Notorious And Not Ancient
Neither Amazing Nor Amatory
Neither Artistic Nor Artificial.
Number of Analytics Nicely Advise:
“Nasty Ally is Nearby
Affected by Narcotics Absolutely”
Nobody Abused
kNowing Approximate Next Abbreviation.
You’re my New Ambition
But Unfortunately
NA is not even N.A.
But N/A
and stands for
Not Available.

I swear

I swear that I will wrote to this blog regularly. No, I don’t say “EVERY DAY” but regularly. I’m not sure now which specialization it will get cause I’m interested in many things. But I promise that very soon readers will get a lot of interesting content.